[shawn]

Well where do I start,

our two oldest kids have decided that A levels are too much for them and have left or are just not attending 6th form.

This leaves the problem of getting them out of bed before lunch to do something else.

As I see it they have had a very long holiday since last June when they finished GCSE's and wanted to do A levels.

Come September last year they enrolled in 6th form went properly for a couple of weeks then realised the school didn't chase them or report to us that they weren't going so they skivved of at least half their lessons

Our eldest has now left school, I found out today it was on the 1 Feb, the other one hasn't been for getting almost that long as well. I'm not sure who I'm more annoyed at now, them for not going or the school for not letting us know they weren't going sooner...

Anyways, any ideas what they should do next, have tried to get them to see the Connexions people but they are both afraid that they might be given a job that doesn't involve staying in bed.

[Andy]

http://www.raf.mod.uk/careers/

This post has been edited by Andy: 05 March 2008 - 08:07 PM

[shawn]

I thought of this for them as well as I did 10 years in the RAF myself and loved almost every minute of it.

I have tried to suggest this to them as well but I'm met with little enthusiasm.

[ProfessorWheeto]

Well for me it kind of went like this:
"Go and sign on and start paying rent or move out"

This post has been edited by ProfessorWheeto: 05 March 2008 - 10:02 PM

[crazydaze]

Tell them they have now joined the real world and need to start paying their way, it's wake up time and time they started realising that living is'nt cheap/easy?

Alex.

[shawn]

ProfessorWheeto, on 5 Mar 2008, 10:01 PM, said:

Well for me it kind of went like this:
"Go and sign on and start paying rent or move out"

Like the sound of this one, might actually wake them up, especially if I pack their bags

crazydaze, on 5 Mar 2008, 10:53 PM, said:

Tell them they have now joined the real world and need to start paying their way, it's wake up time and time they started realising that living is'nt cheap/easy?

Alex.

Unfortunatly ALex my boys suffer from selective hearing coupled with a very well practised way of saying what the grown up in front of them wants to hear, they both admit to understading the "reality of the real world" but then do bugger all about it!







If my wife was to agree I'd show them the door and hand them back to their respective parents who didn't want them when they were younger and see how they cope with them sitting around doing nothing:cursing:









PS Don't get me wrong I do love all my kids but they drive you mad with their lack of direction/ambition/drive. Talking to other parents it seems to be frightenly common amongst teenagers of their age group at the moment...can't help but feel either us as parents or the education system or both have failed them big time somewhere along the line

[andi]

Working for the Council and having worked in the benefits department your story in not uncommon!!! Although you may feel you are the only one in this position.
Actions usually speak louder than words so might be time to padlock or remove food from cupboards and tell them that unless they start paying for keep then they will just have to sgo hungery. You have to be strong and stick to it. We would all rather lie in bed rather than go to work wouldn't? we but who would pay our bills if we did that???
You have to be cruel to be kind. Get them down the Jobsplus see what benefit they are entitled to and get them paying their way. You can only suppoet them for so long. Its a tough cookie this one! Good Luck.

[crazydaze]

Get the local paper, get the classifieds and start looking with them for jobs etc, try supporting them through job application and interviews etc.

Selective hearing? it's simple, I think you need to be firm with them, if I had even thought about sitting about and not getting a job my ASS would have been beaten at that age.

It would be an idea to stop paying their allowance etc as well?

Alex.

[shawn]

They don't get pocket money/allowance they have a little job of 16 hours a week that they do in the local Co-op and reckon that is enough...the oldest does a few extra hours if they ask and it fits in with what he wants to do.

He is in for a big shock as he WILL cough up most of his wages to us for house keeping come pay-day or find more of his luxuries denied (no playing games, watching TV etc. although this is hard to enforce as they all share a bedroom). This might encourage him to get either more permanent hours there or look elsewhere for something.

We were hoping that the desire for a car would encourage him to get a full time job but...

Time to try and get his Dad to enforce what we say as well. He has always backed down to him and lent him cash paid for his phone etc. in the past.

[ProfessorWheeto]

Give him a bill for the week.
I.e a weeks rent on the his room that a lodger would pay, electricity, gas, water, phone, internet, food

That'll be a nasty wake up call